This morning, we got the first official response to the site, through the contact form on the site. It was from a woman that L knows, who has gone to Ashland UCC, but was not around for the most part, when all of this was going on. L was stunned by the message and she called me over to read it to me, in tears. I know that very few people have any idea what L has gone through over all of this. Her passion for the idea of "beloved community" and her belief that this is what existed at the UCC was so thoroughly crushed by the many bizarre actions that people in the community took. Let's read what Dara had to say. It is a remarkable message...
"As a member of the UCC Church in Ashland who has become so incredibly busy in her professional life that she's not had enough time to attend the church in way too long, I was absolutely shocked to learn what had happened to you, L., and to Daniel!
When I'd last attended the church, you were such a long-time, devoted member and so full of loving, beaming outreach to me and to everyone else I'd witnessed about you. You were a light and an inspiration for ACTIVE Christianity, and I admired that you walked the talk, serving on committees and contributing your time and energy to the congregation and community. I even remember being so amazed that "someone" in the church was actually baking the beautiful, tasty communion bread--and that it was you! Wow!
While we didn't yet have the opportunity to spend time together outside of the church, we both attended church activities, such as the Women's Retreat, and to me, you were a symbol of what was good and honest about this special place. You were someone with integrity all about you. You had just begun your relationship with Daniel before I got so busy I could no longer attend regularly, and I was thrilled for you both. I had enjoyed Daniel's music in the park so much, and it just made magical, mystical sense that you two had connected and become a team. Hurray!
And then I received the group email that Daniel sent out about what had happened to you both at the church---and I was stunned! You, of all people, were being singled out for rejection?? No way! WTF?! I asked to be filled in, and I have to say that my jaw has not come up from the floor ever since. Each and every step of this just blows my mind, and I have to say that I am incredibly amazed at the strength and determination you both have shown in the face of what are clearly abuses, lies and deception thrust your way that were absolutely unnecessary! It makes no sense to me whatsoever, that this series of events could not have been handled reasonably and simply from the start, with the open communication and discussion of differences that our church touts, and with so many people within it who claim to be "experts" on such a process and role models for the community. It is clear to me that something "greater than that" in the minds of leadership has been driving this train; that there are agendas and motives to keep you silent, and to not address the issues that are apparently more important to leadership (both locally and nationally) than to live by the creed and principals that the church has espoused. Something is up. Something is being very carefully hidden behind closed doors, and you are knocking at that door and not backing away. I see that as your absolute love for this church---or what you thought it was for all of the years you so devoted.
All of this saddens and shocks me, but I am very glad to know that you are not taking this lying down, and that you are not only addressing this publically for our community to know what is really going on, but that you have seen your place in a greater story about the failings of church leadership--on a local level--but also as a representative of "church abuse and hypocrisy" on a grander scale. I'm sure this is not the role you would have chosen for yourself, but you have taken it up with honor and dignity while making the best of a brutal situation.
While I am processing all of this, I just want you both to know that I respect you and I hope that something great and wonderful will come of this vs. efforts to just brush it under the rug and to "act as if" this is all just about a couple of people causing trouble. It is hardly that.
With appreciation, Dara Crockett